You love their company. Their always down to go out, have fun, party, laugh, chill, go for coffee, come over, you name it.
Then, it happens.
No texts, no phone calls, no more hanging out.
This post is dedicated to all the good people out there who have been ditched by friends who have run off into the sunset with their fresh-off-the-market significant others. Here is a message to all you friend ditchers out there:
It is a giant piss off when you “friend ditchers” choose to leave your circle of friends for that one guy or girl. We hate to admit it, but we truly enjoyed your company and all the good times before being ditched. However, had we known that we’d be so easily dumped for what what could be a temporary fling, we would have re-evaluated being your friend in the first place.
Stupid us, though. Because when you finally get dumped by your partner or do the dumping, you come running back as if you had never left. Suddenly, we’re of importance again and are put on the spot to bring back the “good old days.”
“BRO! WHATS HAPPENING, HAVEN’T SEEN YOU IN FOREVER, TIMS TONIGHT?”
Translation: “Bro, I got dumped after a 3 year relationship, I have nobody to chill with since I lost all my friends in the process…so….wanna chill?”
Here’s a reality check for all of you friend ditchers: Ditching your friends while you’re in a relationship is THE worst thing you can do. The best part is that after you get dumped, you complain about how “the bitch tied you down” and how you felt like you were already married with three kids.
Friends, ladies and gentlemen, are your tickets to FREEDOM for that twice or three times a week. They’re healthy for your relationships. They’re your chance to vent and bitch about whatever it is that gets you nervous about your partner (all in good fun of course). They are your support system, your change of routine, your escape, your fun.
So why on earth would you give that all up for someone who yes, can potentially become a big part of your life, but offers no guarantees. Friends, if they are true and genuine, are for life. However, that respect has to be mutual or else it won’t exist at all.
To conclude, if you have been a victim of friend ditching, the best advice I can give is forgive the first time around, but sure as hell not the second.
Everyone makes mistakes, and yes, it could very well happen that the first love someone finds, they get blinded and give themselves completely to the other person. As much as its a total piss off, you need to let them make the mistake of ditching their friends and realize it on their own. Chances are they will come crying back, and depending on how good of a friend they are, it’s up to you to decide whether or not you want to forgive.
If they ditch for a second or third time around, then they don’t deserve your friendship and you don’t deserve having an “in-and-out” friend.
So folks, if you’ve never given up a friendship for a girlfriend or boyfriend, give yourselves a pat on the back.
If you have, or are currently involved in “friend ditching” activities…then have fun partying at your wedding with 50 year-old-plus guests.
And no, I don’t want to go to Tims tonight.